I was wrong about normalizing anxiety

In the past, I've said normalizing anxiety is a terrible idea. Then I thought about it...

A key part of my work with clients is to help them understand and accept their feelings without reacting to them. And I spend a lot of time on the phone with people explaining why they're not crazy and their symptoms make sense. Isn't that the same thing as normalizing?

I still say the trend of normalizing anxiety as an aspect of our identity is hugely damaging. On the other hand, accepting anxiety as a normal response to trauma and overwhelm is a key ingredient in healing.

So what's the difference?

Let's say we lived in a society that had no understanding of the skeletal system. We don't know why bones break. And we don't know that even though a meta tarsal bone is very different from a pelvic bone, they're still part of the same system and can be healed by the same set of principles.

So what happens? Well, a lot of people end up in a lot of pain. Some people come up with all kinds of theories about where the pain comes from. Most people just learn to manage it, and mold their life around it. A lot of people are walking around with deformities from bones that were never reset.

If you had even just a basic knowledge about what bones are and how to heal them, would you sit back and not say anything when people started normalizing this way of life? No! You'd start telling people that being in constant pain and managing skeletal deformities for the rest of their life is not normal and totally fixable.

You might find people confiding in you, "I know this sounds crazy, but sometimes the pain in my legs is so great that I just can't get out of bed in the morning. When I do get out of bed, I just barely make it through the day. I'm just waiting to go home and lie on my couch. The pain doesn't go away, but it's a little more manageable"

The first thing that person needs to know is that OF COURSE they're in pain. OF COURSE they have a hard time walking around all day. THEIR LEG IS BROKEN!

So yeah. Let's normalize being in pain when a vital bodily system is broken or fractured. Let's not normalize the idea that this is just the way life is, forever.